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While I won't promise there isn't coy wordplay ahead, I can say there's far more to making the most of Pirates than the stale references you've seen elsewhere

At 2 mana, its easy to cast and impact the board early

It's static tosses counters here as you cast those nondorks

Having to pay the discard as part of the cost is a risk but it is one worth taking for these powerful little enablers

One mana to deal three damage is very warping, and having access to eight copies of this effect was a defining influence on early deckbuilding

The idea of digital-only cards that paper players would never get to use was divisive enough